Q&A How Can I Get Answers from My Mate?

Thank you for always being so great about answering our questions. Here is another for you! We are into week 16 post d-day. I'm trying to advance my thinking toward forgiveness and reframing. I keep getting stuck in the questions I may never have answers to (e.g., Why are you interested in building a life with me now and you weren't when you had the affair? Why did you have the affair? Why didn't you stop it? Others.) Can you speak to 1. Resources that would help with resolution and 2. Does the intensity of not having these answers reduce in time? Thank you!