Q&A What Are the Old Behaviors That I Should Seek to Avoid?

Week 11 of EMS Online discusses Bottom Line Behaviors. I can not identify any old behaviors that I would seek to avoid that would result in it being less likely that I am betrayed again. I liken this to me being the driver of a parked car. My unfaithful spouse is the driver of a car that rammed me and resulted in my car being wrecked. What are the old behaviors that I should seek to avoid? I am not a co-dependent to my spouses sex addiction. I did not know that they were going on for 17 years. I can not understand what behaviors I did that had anything to do with his coming into our marriage with sex addiction and therefore I do not know what it is that I should be seeking to avoid ... seeking not to relapse into. Please explain. I'm very confused and it feels like I am being considered somehow "contributory" to this injury I have incurred.