When you have been manipulated and lied to you cover an affair and other acting out for many years what do you look for to know it's not still happening? Even when I thought I got full disclosure a couple of years ago and we were working on our marriage and I thought it was improving; the affair was not only still happening but it had increased in intimacy and frequency. We are almost done with EMS Online and I think I'm seeing positive changes from him but I can't help but be scared I'm still being manipulated and lied to. Is there a way to know if the manipulation and lies have stopped? If not, will it just take consistency in behavior and time for me to feel safe again?