Strong winds are blowing outside and the cold is hard to deny. We're in the cusp of springtime, and just a few days ago it was nice and in the 70s. A familiar heaviness burdens me, and it's hard to shake off. I pray and am tired. I know I want to get up and go and do things. I have things to do, but I refuse to write this off as lazy. It's my day off; however, I just seem a little weak or unmotivated, which is frustrating because I like to do things on my days off. I went to do my favorite exercises, but was not confident there. I have not been my usual ball of excitement, but if I think about it, it's been maybe a week or more now. It saddens me. I know this month is D-day month. I loathe that it would get to me. The month came to a slow crawl as it neared,...
Today you'll hear from our newest video blogger, Mickey. Have you ever considered that there may be benefits to addiction recovery work? Maybe you're wondering 'can anything good ever come of my addiction?' Today you'll hear not only a few positives that have come out of Mickey's journey, but you'll also gain a palatable understanding of how to move through addiction into wholeness and personal restoration.
In the journey of healing, it's vital that we find healing guides who have walked this way before, who can courageously share their stories of successes and failures. Today is the first in a new series by Mickey highlighting the benefits of working a recovery program. During this series, he will share his own journey of healing and restoration, as it pertains to sex addiction and saving his own...
On the path of beginning to heal a relationship after infidelity, oftentimes in the middle of a fight, a spouse or partner may not know what they need in that moment. They don’t know if they need answers, comfort, direction, or to have their hand held. Science says it takes 1/200th of a second for the betrayed spouse to flood emotionally. The triggers and onslaught of emotions can come on so quickly, that a partner can be lost for understanding what they need. Enter the unfaithful, perhaps genuinely trying to help the betrayed, but clueless on how to support them in their pain or hurt. They try X; it fails miserably. They try Y; it goes from bad to worse. It can leave both parties reeling in despair, wondering if there is any practical hope to...
Part I: What is Forgiveness Anyway? Part II: The Journey of a Lifetime
Last time we talked about the reality of forgiveness - what it is and what it isn't - and how forgiveness plays a vital role in recovery and potential reconciliation. So why don't people forgive? Lots of reasons. Fear, pride, anger, resentment, bitterness and a lack of understanding of forgiveness are some of them. While I would never wish to relive this season of my life, it has offered me a great deal of self-examination. To begin to consider life after betrayal, I had to take a hard look at myself. Was I prideful? Yes, probably. Considering forgiveness of this deeply personal and intimate...
In the spirit of this Easter and Resurrection season, today Rodney and Angela share an old hymn that celebrates the good news of the Gospel - Jesus' death, burial, and resurrection - "Jesus Paid It All." For the believer, His payment on the cross changes everything. Imagine owing a debt so large, you could never pay it off. Even the sum total of life's wages and possessions would leave you drastically short, because of your own sin. You've resolved that even in death, you will never be free. Yet, somehow, through no merit of your own, you hear that someone, on your behalf, completely erased all your debt. When the reality of this truth sinks in, what immense joy and gratitude fills your heart, knowing that you no longer have to live life under a cloud of sin, guilt, shame, fear, and...
It's no secret that infidelity is traumatizing. But what about childhood trauma? What about neglect and/or abuse as a child? The hard truth is, healing from all levels of trauma is difficult, and infidelity trauma doesn't help. When trying to heal from this type of pain, it's vital we have practical tools that we can use to find solace and ultimately, learn to self-soothe. Today, Samuel shares four tools he has used in his own journey of healing, from both infidelity and childhood trauma. The good news is, whether you caused the infidelity or are a victim of the choices of another, healing is possible, and there is hope for repairing the damage from both childhood and adulthood when the right tools are employed. All of us at Affair Recovery hope that today's message fuels your own personal...
When discussing forgiveness of marital betrayal, other words that often spring to mind include impossible, unfair, and undeserved. Some of you may have even cringed at the mention of forgiveness. I definitely understand that. I think this topic is so hard to wrap our heads around when we are reeling from the pain and upheaval caused by infidelity, and it can seem out of the realm of possibility to even care about forgiveness. Every situation is different, so I can only tell you about mine.
When my husband first confessed his affair, I was numb. In my situation, I had...
Today we share what is probably known as the most popular and well-loved hymn of our time, "Amazing Grace." Simply put, grace is God's unmerited, unearned favor. GRACE could also be an acronym for God's Riches At Christ's Expense. It's Him doing for us what we could never do for ourselves. What makes grace so amazing is that as fallen, sinful people, God still loves us unconditionally. Whether you have been maritally unfaithful or betrayed, God's grace is available to you. He trades our poverty for His riches, our weakness for His strength, and earth's sorrows for heaven's joy. As these words are sung over you, may you sense God's refreshing peace - and His amazing love drawing you close to Him.
I can remember how heavy my brow would get, yet not realize how angry and scary I looked storming through the house... more than likely unpleasant to just be around, let alone speak to. I can imagine my whole family just mirroring how unhappy I was. And that they did.
I was too busy in my misery to even notice that my kids were sliding into a downward spiral along with me. Where was their nurturing mom now? And when I was my loving self and happy, fun, and laughing mom, it was short lived and I was almost unrecognizable, or I was not fooling anyone. It was just too hard to hide the cracks.
New baby, new and gigantic wound from an explosion beyond anything imaginable. But I've been through so much in life already; how can this compare or be worse? And he just shrugs it off like nothing. A shrug! Not only is my pride destroyed, I am suddenly beyond repose, past shocked and...
Here is a quick audio version of the song: The Angry GIFTS Song
Today we will present a fun one-minute original song to help pull back the curtain of anger to uncover the primary emotions beneath. Using the GIFTS acronym from the EMS Curriculum, we're able to practice self-awareness, self-expression, and self-management. Ephesians 4:26a instructs us to, "Be angry but do not sin." Anger, as with fire, can create danger if it's not managed well. However, with proper boundaries, as fire within the safety of a fireplace, it can assist in creating an environment of warmth, intimacy, and vulnerability. How are you dealing with your anger - and how is it dealing with you? Is it being used as fuel to enhance your relationships and improve communication, or is there destruction from...
