I know exactly how you feel. My husband thought he had hidden his affair for 21 years. I knew when it was going on & who she was. I asked him about her - he lied. I stayed because it would have devastated my family who loved him, but I distanced myself from him and began living my life for myself and did the things that made me happy. I was not willing to break my values or vows, but I went places, saw things, and enjoyed activities without him. When he finally admitted it and asked forgiveness and for me to love him like I once did, I explained that I was not the same person who had once loved him more than anything. He wanted to know what he could do so I would love him again I said “when you can look me in the eyes and tell me you have always been faithful to me and our marriage vows, I will love you as I once did”. He cried. I care about him, but what once was is no more. He put my health and life at risk (there are diseases you can’t wash off) to make himself feel good. As a very wise friend once told me- “when someone shows you who they are, believe them. That’s who they are”.
Betrayal is the end
I know exactly how you feel. My husband thought he had hidden his affair for 21 years. I knew when it was going on & who she was. I asked him about her - he lied. I stayed because it would have devastated my family who loved him, but I distanced myself from him and began living my life for myself and did the things that made me happy. I was not willing to break my values or vows, but I went places, saw things, and enjoyed activities without him. When he finally admitted it and asked forgiveness and for me to love him like I once did, I explained that I was not the same person who had once loved him more than anything. He wanted to know what he could do so I would love him again I said “when you can look me in the eyes and tell me you have always been faithful to me and our marriage vows, I will love you as I once did”. He cried. I care about him, but what once was is no more. He put my health and life at risk (there are diseases you can’t wash off) to make himself feel good. As a very wise friend once told me- “when someone shows you who they are, believe them. That’s who they are”.