I as the hurt spouse applaud your thoughts and hope that you carry through on them. I for the longest time did not respond in kind to offers for dinner and such. This was because when we went out, I only could envision how my husband had taken her out. Did he hold her hand like he did mine? Did he lead so gallantly as he does with me? I suspected so. As I knew he would be on his best behavior and trying to impress. It took me a very long time. (Years) but I am now finally able to accept an invitation and not see before me a moving picture of what my imagination had conjured up regarding his past affair. My husband did not give up either. And I applaud your resolve in not doing so either. It will surly take a while, but your spouse will cone around eventually. It takes whatever it takes for each of us to work the whole thing through. There is an end to the tunnel. Even if you are not quite seeing the light as of yet. Carry on!
Response for pwrwagn
I as the hurt spouse applaud your thoughts and hope that you carry through on them. I for the longest time did not respond in kind to offers for dinner and such. This was because when we went out, I only could envision how my husband had taken her out. Did he hold her hand like he did mine? Did he lead so gallantly as he does with me? I suspected so. As I knew he would be on his best behavior and trying to impress. It took me a very long time. (Years) but I am now finally able to accept an invitation and not see before me a moving picture of what my imagination had conjured up regarding his past affair. My husband did not give up either. And I applaud your resolve in not doing so either. It will surly take a while, but your spouse will cone around eventually. It takes whatever it takes for each of us to work the whole thing through. There is an end to the tunnel. Even if you are not quite seeing the light as of yet. Carry on!