I am the betrayed Spouse who has had anger issues in the past which was in part the cause of the deterioration of the marriage. Affair on him not me. I read a lot on the subject of anger which is a very tangible emotion to have to reckon with. What I don't hear a lot about is emotional apathy which can trigger anger. I am often the target of being the problem - but want to say this. I spent years expressing in both a kindly and not so kindly way that I needed support which fell on deaf ears because of what I view as emotional apathy for another's needs. Anger is no good - and easily seen, judged. Emotional apathy not so much and the focus turns to the anger as being the rooted issue. Not so. Emotional apathy can create an angry response over time if never addressed or viewed as a rooted issue causing separation and isolation in a marriage.
Anger
I am the betrayed Spouse who has had anger issues in the past which was in part the cause of the deterioration of the marriage. Affair on him not me. I read a lot on the subject of anger which is a very tangible emotion to have to reckon with. What I don't hear a lot about is emotional apathy which can trigger anger. I am often the target of being the problem - but want to say this. I spent years expressing in both a kindly and not so kindly way that I needed support which fell on deaf ears because of what I view as emotional apathy for another's needs. Anger is no good - and easily seen, judged. Emotional apathy not so much and the focus turns to the anger as being the rooted issue. Not so. Emotional apathy can create an angry response over time if never addressed or viewed as a rooted issue causing separation and isolation in a marriage.