My husband and I have been together for 13 years, married for 3. He had 2 previous cheating experiences prior to marriage, and is currently having another. I found out about the current one when he had packed his things and walked out the door. I begged and pleaded with him to think about what he was doing. He did for a bit. I kept telling him that when two people love each other anything can be worked through. Our relationship could be even better than before. He continued to be distant, and finally he asked if I truly believed that...that anything could be worked through. Of course I said yes. A day or two later, he disclosed the real reason he wasn't talking with me. He said that the OW had told him she was pregnant. He was terrified that if he told me what was happening, I would tuck tail and run. I didn't. If God saw fit for there to be a child, especially considering that I would give my right arm to be able to have another, that's fine and dandy in my book. For 3 months we sat back and let this woman control our lives. She faked a miscarriage. I started questioning whether she was being honest at all. I finally confirmed that she was lying the entire time. We continued to "get over" what had happened, with him telling me it was over between them and that he was in the marriage 110%. We knew the areas we needed to work on. I had fallen into depression and PTSD for the past 6 years. It took him walking out on me to let me see that I needed to make some much needed changes in my life. I wasn't the wife, nor the person I needed to be. I picked myself up, stopped taking the medicines prescribed me, got a job, and completely overhauled my life. One day when my DH was supposed to be staying with me, he blindsides me yet again saying that he still isn't truly happy. When I got home, I realized he had packed his things. I went and asked for the house key back. I asked if he had been talking to someone else. Sure enough...he had never actually broken it off with this woman who had just put our lives through hell. And best yet, she was now saying she was pregnant again. (in the beginning, she had told him she was unable to get pregnant. Funny how she keeps having these little miracles). So he has been struggling with what to do, and keeps himself confused to the point of no return. I'm trying to work the relationship out. He's still chasing his tail. I'm trying to hold hope that things can only get better. This is one of the roughest and lowest places I have ever been in my life. I keep reminding myself that fear and faith cannot exist in the same place.
Having a tough time
My husband and I have been together for 13 years, married for 3. He had 2 previous cheating experiences prior to marriage, and is currently having another. I found out about the current one when he had packed his things and walked out the door. I begged and pleaded with him to think about what he was doing. He did for a bit. I kept telling him that when two people love each other anything can be worked through. Our relationship could be even better than before. He continued to be distant, and finally he asked if I truly believed that...that anything could be worked through. Of course I said yes. A day or two later, he disclosed the real reason he wasn't talking with me. He said that the OW had told him she was pregnant. He was terrified that if he told me what was happening, I would tuck tail and run. I didn't. If God saw fit for there to be a child, especially considering that I would give my right arm to be able to have another, that's fine and dandy in my book. For 3 months we sat back and let this woman control our lives. She faked a miscarriage. I started questioning whether she was being honest at all. I finally confirmed that she was lying the entire time. We continued to "get over" what had happened, with him telling me it was over between them and that he was in the marriage 110%. We knew the areas we needed to work on. I had fallen into depression and PTSD for the past 6 years. It took him walking out on me to let me see that I needed to make some much needed changes in my life. I wasn't the wife, nor the person I needed to be. I picked myself up, stopped taking the medicines prescribed me, got a job, and completely overhauled my life. One day when my DH was supposed to be staying with me, he blindsides me yet again saying that he still isn't truly happy. When I got home, I realized he had packed his things. I went and asked for the house key back. I asked if he had been talking to someone else. Sure enough...he had never actually broken it off with this woman who had just put our lives through hell. And best yet, she was now saying she was pregnant again. (in the beginning, she had told him she was unable to get pregnant. Funny how she keeps having these little miracles). So he has been struggling with what to do, and keeps himself confused to the point of no return. I'm trying to work the relationship out. He's still chasing his tail. I'm trying to hold hope that things can only get better. This is one of the roughest and lowest places I have ever been in my life. I keep reminding myself that fear and faith cannot exist in the same place.