Q&A How Do I Stop Feeling Shame over My Husband's Thoughts?

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Question: 

Whenever I am around women that I know my husband has taken advantage of in his mind, lusted after, and compulsively masturbated to, then I have overwhelming anxiety and sometimes flooding and panic attacks when we get back home. I also have a sense of guilt that I was not able to protect these women from his perversion. They are close to me and I feel shame and guilt. They are completely innocent in all this and know nothing about it and it was my husband that couldn't control his mind. I am a protector by nature. My husband is getting help for his addiction and is committed to a lifelong recovery, whatever it takes. He has been getting help for several months now. I want to stay in the marriage with all my heart, but I am torn up inside whenever we are around these other women. They are very close to me and not having contact with me as well as with my husband is out of the question. How do I stop feeling all these feelings and emotions when I am around them? I want to have my sanity and close relationships back.

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I would highly recommend giving this a try.
 
-D, Texas