He picked endless fights, blamed me for ruining his life for 15 years, brought up historical (long-forgotten fights) from over a dozen years ago etc and bitterly attacked me like the fights had just happened yesterday? He said I "abused" him for more than a decade and was like a broken record with his endless recitations of how I had done him wrong. Friends and family were so angry with how he rewrote our history -- up until two months before all this started he was still writing me love letters, describing me as "his wife -- his life". I feel so devastated and blindsided and can't see the way out of the grief. It will be 4 months tomorrow and I am still in agony and my head is spinning, given in the last two months he has been the very picture of remorse and says I am the most important thing in the world to him -- that he loves me more than anything -- including the kids. I can't trust anything, given in January he told me he felt no more for me than a "stranger in a bus shelter". I'd always felt so beloved for more than two decades -- and then for 6 months he became a vengeful demon. It felt like a monster had taken his place.