My husband always viewed my not wanting sex as often as he did as me not being attracted to him and not wanting him. It was the biggest thing we ever disagreed about. I told him once that I tried to remind myself to have sex more often and he said I shouldn't have to remind myself, I should just want to have sex with him if I was really attracted to him and loved him. I didn't feel like not wanting sex as often meant I didn't love him and that if he loved me he would understand that men and women are different. He had several different types of affairs over a 6 year period. We are a little over a year out from D-day and on the intimacy lesson in EMS online. My fear is that we will still have this same road block on frequency where he ends up feeling rejected or I end up feeling like I'm somehow failing. It's an old and frustrating pattern that I would like to not repeat. What should we do?

Rick's suggested resources:

• Come as You Are: The Surprising New Science that Will Transform Your Sex Life by Emily Nagoski