Thank you Melissa, great words, feeling & encourament. I'm in some of that mess right now but not only me.

I found your words and idea of using a thought audit is something I needed to hear. It is so easy for me to slip into the victimhood of black and white thinking and being unaware of all the things that are good in my life. It is much easier to just focus on the things that went wrong. I feel a thought audit is a tool I will use going forward. Thank you for this!

Oh my goodness, this is one of the most helpful videos I've watched on AR. A FEMALE that has been through it--is going through it. You offer so much hope and your empathy shines through. I was just weeping the whole time--thank you so much for understanding the trauma, while still empowering us--helping us to try to recall who we really are. I was just saying to myself (yes, to myself) how this trauma is all I can think about--ruminating 24/7, even in my sleep. So, thank you for reminding me that there is this whole world out there. That suffering is a part of life and a part of the human experience--I am not alone. That I am not completely helpless, although I feel that way many days--5 months out from D day. Again, thank you so much for sharing your heart, being vulnerable, and helping to comfort and empower us through these trying days. ~ Julie

I liked this video and the idea of a thought audit. I'm at the point where I want to start choosing to be hopeful 8 months from DD1 and 3 months from the last DD. Im the betrayed but your account really helped me gain some empathy for my wayward partner and how hard it must be for him right now and it helped to be reminded we are going through this together and your obvious remorse made me see how sincerely he is working to walk through this pain with me while trying not to beat himself up with toxic shame. What a difficult tight rope to walk! Thank you so much for sharing and i hope you find some comfort and light this holiday season.