My spouse was almost bi-polar in his behaviour toward me. Swinging from "your the most beautiful thing I wake up to every morning" to nasty "you don't know anything" and abusive. I was everything and nothing all at once. Now nearly 3 years out and I don't know if I'LOL ever believe anything that's comes out of his mouth. Finally he has started individual and couples counselling. It was that or I was done. No gratitude and no empathy. The couples counsellor asked in a safe way if he thought he was psychopathic. Apparently he can feel empathy for everyone else except me and sometimes our children. I think a lot is part of his personality disorder. Yet to discover what that is. But I am tired no exhausted I mean really at 47 you should have some of your H ni together. I just want him to adult and stop blaming everyone and everything else for his issues. Things will never be the same and I won't ever trust him again. Sad but true. Life goes on. And as for the 80%, gee I wasn't even getting that for the last 25 years. I learnt pretty early on he was less then what he presented but I just loved him anyways. Very little in return there I've now found out. My compassion and unconditional love was rewarded with a fraud. A well hidden counterfeit. Not sure why he wants to stay but he does. You talk about new beginnings but very few people can make something out of so much destruction and trauma. It's like my son who broke his neck at 19yrs old and is a C4 quadriplegic. He's still my son but physically broken and has had to learn new ways to live. May the Lord bless us to get through these terrible experiences.
Never the same...
My spouse was almost bi-polar in his behaviour toward me. Swinging from "your the most beautiful thing I wake up to every morning" to nasty "you don't know anything" and abusive. I was everything and nothing all at once. Now nearly 3 years out and I don't know if I'LOL ever believe anything that's comes out of his mouth. Finally he has started individual and couples counselling. It was that or I was done. No gratitude and no empathy. The couples counsellor asked in a safe way if he thought he was psychopathic. Apparently he can feel empathy for everyone else except me and sometimes our children. I think a lot is part of his personality disorder. Yet to discover what that is. But I am tired no exhausted I mean really at 47 you should have some of your H ni together. I just want him to adult and stop blaming everyone and everything else for his issues. Things will never be the same and I won't ever trust him again. Sad but true. Life goes on. And as for the 80%, gee I wasn't even getting that for the last 25 years. I learnt pretty early on he was less then what he presented but I just loved him anyways. Very little in return there I've now found out. My compassion and unconditional love was rewarded with a fraud. A well hidden counterfeit. Not sure why he wants to stay but he does. You talk about new beginnings but very few people can make something out of so much destruction and trauma. It's like my son who broke his neck at 19yrs old and is a C4 quadriplegic. He's still my son but physically broken and has had to learn new ways to live. May the Lord bless us to get through these terrible experiences.