Q&A How Do I Get to the Point That I Feel Good about the Way That I Look?

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Question

Throughout my 9 years of marriage my husband would on & off tell me of what he considered to be my physical "imperfections." He had a list of 5 different things he didn't like about the way I looked & thought could be improved. It was always hurtful to me and he would apologize but then keep doing it. He would just blurt things out & it was like he couldn't control what he said! Some of the things that he considered to be my flaws didn't even make any since to me at all, while other things I actually agreed with him about. Since I recently discovered his porn addiction, he has begun a process of retraining his mind/thoughts, including avoiding looking at other women & comparing me. Now all of a sudden I'm the background on his screensaver & I’m super sexy & "perfect." I am thankful of his change of heart, but it doesn't make me feel that great knowing that now I'm suddenly so attractive only because he isn't comparing me to other women. On top of that I'm always wondering if he is going to compare me or lust when we run into someone attractive. This has become such a trigger for me, that I start automatically comparing myself to any attractive person I come across! The worst is when I see people that fit my husband’s description of the way he wanted me to look like... Recently I also noticed him staring at my small amount of belly fat & when I confronted him he didn't deny it. How do I get to the point where I feel good about how I look despite my physical imperfections & despite whatever my husband thinks about the way I look?

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I would highly recommend giving this a try.
 
-D, Texas