My husband had an emotional affair four years ago. It became a physical affair recently with the same woman when she ended her marriage and pursued my husband. When he confessed, he said he can’t control himself. He also said he might be gay since he’d looked at gay porn more than once. He said he has no idea who he is and he is not whole. He is also an alcoholic. During the timeframe of the second affair, he wasn’t able to perform sexually with me and asked me to dance for him. This was a first in our 12 years together in that he didn’t have an issue performing without a dance ever before. His behavior also changed during this time where he was more sexual with his attitude and speech. He has pimped tenderness and did grooming behavior for the last several years too, always having secret “friendships” with women and always flirtations, seemingly an insatiable appetite for female attention. He is a very secretive, private, and dishonest person. His mother is an alcoholic and was extremely neglectful of him as a child, so I assume it’s related to his childhood trauma. Is his behavior typical of someone having an affair or are these signs of sexual addiction?