I have read the Affair Recovery material regarding this issue and understand the logic in not confronting the affair partner. I am realistic about expectations but I don’t think I can live knowing she believes she and my husband still share a secret from me. The affair was 10 years ago, and he has not had contact with her since shortly after it ended. I know she would not likely have any compassion, so I don’t expect anything and would not ask any questions but I can’t stand the thought that she thinks they still share this secret between them, on top of the secret of the betrayal during the affair - during which we also had many social interactions, in which I was made to be a fool, adding insult to injury. I just want her to know that I know. As much as I would prefer it to be in person to see her face as I’m sure she would be shocked that he finally told me, I’m thinking a phone call. What are your thoughts on this?