Q&A Should I Reconcile with the Affair Partner Who Was a Close Friend?

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Question: 

My husband had a 1-year limerent affair with a married woman. The AP and her husband were our friends. Also, the AP and I were girlfriends, or so I thought. My husband and the AP made a complete break after D-Day. We have been doing a lot of recovery work, both individually and as a couple, we are committed to our marriage, and I have forgiven him. My understanding is that the AP and her husband are also recovering and reconciling. However, I don’t know where they are at in their recovery or what work they are doing. I have a lot of anger and resentment toward the AP, but I recognize that I need to forgive and release it. Do you ever recommend a future time when the AP and I should communicate to release the past? Do you have any recommendation on whether my husband and her husband should meet to do the same? Would communication help or hurt the betrayed spouse? If help, who should initiate it, and what should be the safety parameters?

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I would highly recommend giving this a try.
 
-D, Texas