Hi Rick,

Thank you for your time and dedication to couples who are dealing with affairs in their marriages. My husband, the betrayed, said to me last night," it's hard to have hope in doing the right thing (by staying together) when there are no male role models (on the AR boards or leading groups) who are happy with their lives after their wife had an affair." 

My husband tells me that the men's board is filled with stories of pain and unhappy lives that men are experiencing, even 8 years after the affair. My husband wants to commit to our marriage if there's hope he can still have a happy life. My question comes from deep in my heart with vulnerability: please be honest with us, why is that true? Is it especially challenging to find men who are happy after their wife had an affair to lead groups and mentor on the men's wall? Even 8, 10, 15 years after the affair?

I am fully engaged and dedicated to recovery and our marriage.

Thank you so much for speaking gently to our hearts on this one.