Rick, My husband had an affair that lasted nearly two years. Looking back he blames me for the ongoing fighting between us. When I look back to the time the affair started, we had normal disagreements, I was a new mother and we had many blessings. I’m convinced that the affair contributed to the fighting as it was a divisive spirit that entered our relationship. He refuses to see this and claims they are separate; his affair did not contribute to us becoming more and more divided. I’m baffled at how he can’t seem to make the relationship between the two actions. Please tell me, is there a relationship between the affair and the spouses' relationship? It seems obvious, but in your experience do you hear about couples having more and more problems while the affair is going on? How can I get him to see that the fruit of the affair produced a wedge between us and it pushed us farther and farther apart??