My husband and I are 16 months out from our third D-Day. One of his affairs was a ten year emotional affair with a co-worker that became sexual messaging. He said numerous times he loved her in the messages. When I found out we didn’t get recovery help. I think that is what led to the last eleven month online emotional and sexual affair with a different woman. We are communicating and working through it so much better this time. But now that our routine is returning I find myself in panic mode. I’m scared of being happy because I think then if it happens again it will hurt so much worse. Again, he is doing everything right. Why can’t I just let myself be happy?