Q&A Does My Husband Really Have to 'Get It' to Be Safe For My Own Healing?

My husband's behavior has stopped. He is doing work on himself to be safe. He is invested in my healing and tries to be empathetic. He did Hope for Healing, I did Harboring Hope, and we attended EMS Weekend. We are 18 months past the last D-Day. There is a situation that keeps coming up for me, that was extremely painful with a woman I have to work with. He never had a physical affair with her, however he was very inappropriate, and spoke some very traumatic and hurtful comparisons regarding her and I, to me. His behavior has changed, but he doesn't really get the impact his actions had on me surrounding her. In his mind, it was never physical, so it isn't that "bad". Do I really need him to understand for my healing? As long as he is being safe, and stopped the behavior, does he really need to get it? It is like a nagging thorn in my side, that gets irritated each time I have to work with her, especially if my husband and her are in the same place... I feel like I'm beating a dead horse when this issue comes up. I just want to heal and this not be a nagging issue any longer, do I just need to let it go?