We are currently on Week 5 of EMS Online. My spouse has been living with his parents for 10 months due to substantial gambling debt accrued during his double life of sexual affairs and drug and alcohol abuse. Recently, he expressed a strong desire to return home (8 hours away), find work, and rebuild our relationship. After spending my entire savings on his recovery treatment, I have set a firm boundary: he must take full responsibility for his financial affairs, and I will no longer provide financial support or take on any additional responsibilities for him. Before returning, he must be self-supporting and fully transparent. I’ve also requested that he take a polygraph, which I am willing to pay for, due to his history of living a double life over the past three years. Even after disclosure, he continued deceiving me and his parents despite completing the Hope for Healing program and repeatedly swearing transparency. His anger when insisting I trust him, as advised in Harboring Hope, only deepened my doubts. Despite the evidence of ongoing deceit, his parents, who have no experience with infidelity recovery, are advising him to refuse the polygraph. His AA sponsor, also inexperienced in infidelity recovery, has echoed this advice. While they may mean well, this advice feels like it’s protecting his ego and sickness, isolating me as the "bad guy." It is not aligned with affair recovery recommendations. Please help us navigate this outside advice and establish boundaries to protect our relationship.