How long should I push back on filing for divorce? You recommend 18 -24 months from d day but if my spouse, the unfaithful, is insistent on sooner (as in asap) what should I do? I read elsewhere to make it as unappealing and painful as possible so the affair fog lifts some. I also think he's depressed but have no idea how to get him to see that. This is exhausting. We are only 4 months from d day. I do believe he's stopped the affair. I also found out recently that his affair partner may have gone to Vegas recently to work as a prostitute for the weekend. When this came to light, my husband started acting out worse. Also, should I notify her suspecting soon-to-be-ex husband of the affair? He has his suspicion and I feel a little bad for him floundering.