I feel the classic case of “the wife is the last to know.” My husband had a long term affair with his secretary. At the time of the affair he told so many people about it. Friends,family, coworkers. No one told me. Not even my own brother. My husband says he doesn’t know why he told whomever would listen. Was he hoping to get caught in an effort to have me end the marriage? He says he didn’t want that. By the time of discovery the affair had been over for about 18 years. Do you have some insight on why a spouse would be so cavalier as to practically brag about being a cheater?