My husband and I are more than half way through EMSO. The first D-Day was 4 months ago, the second 3 months. My husband is not safe for me. I have not a rational conversation with him yet. I've truly tried to, many times. I see contempt. I see denial. I see bitterness and resentment. I see tons of defensiveness. My house is usually silent, until I muster up the courage to try again. But no resolutions come, I don't feel heard, my words are twisted around. I try to be very careful to not sound attacking, to humbly come to him with my concerns. What can a spouse do while waiting for the other to be safe?