Are You Attached to an Outcome?

Amber (New!)

Alumna, Grateful Wayward. Strong believer in small group recovery and the power of sharing our faith, experience, strength, and hope in community. Miracles happen.

Alumnus, betrayed. Be a voice of encouragement for those in pain and navigating emotional trauma. The journey to healing can seem impossible, but don’t ever give up as there is a light at the end of that tunnel. Please show yourself compassion, grace, and love.

Tara (Coming Soon!)

Alumna, betrayed. Healing from loss of betrayal, marriage, spouse, and the life I thought I had…to discover hope for new beginnings. As a Grief Recovery Specialist, I am passionate about helping others find hope again.

Karen

Alumna, betrayed. After enduring Betrayal Trauma, Karen developed a passion for assisting other betrayed partners in their journey to grieve, find hope, and rebuild their lives following such a life-shattering event.

Candace

Alumna. Proud to walk with you through the drama and trauma caused by infidelity.

Rachel

Alumna, Betrayed. A compassionate traveling companion who walks alongside those seeking hope, health, and harmony through betrayal trauma.

Kristen

Alumna. Wayward. Using the experience and learnings from my own healing to inspire and encourage others on their journey post-infidelity.

Melissa

Wayward codependent. Empowering others to find hope and healing in their own recovery and restoration journey. Passionate about the ripple effects of healing from infidelity on the younger generations.

Songs For the Soul

Alumni. Rodney and Angela. Channeling hope and healing through music after experiencing God's healing power from the tsunami of infidelity.

Michaela

Alumna, navigating recovery from both sides of infidelity. Bringing hope to those enduring their darkest moments.

Stephanie

Alumna. Betrayed. Seeking to inspire hope in those recovering from the devastating effects of infidelity or addiction.

Mickey

Alumnus. Wayward. Encouraging those walking the road of addiction recovery by sharing his own journey of healing and restoration.

Jen

Alumna, Betrayed. Seeking God's grace to find meaning and purpose in the pain. Hoping to share my life raft with others drowning in the despair of infidelity.

Samuel

Alumnus, Wayward. Providing hope, encouragement and infidelity-specific insight to anyone in recovery from betrayal.

Grace

Alumna. Betrayed. Sharing her testimony of God's miraculous healing from betrayal trauma to inspire hope in others.

Nicole

Alumna. Wayward. Sharing hope with others struggling from the shame and destruction of their bad choices. Restoring the broken pieces by the healing power of God’s unfailing love.

Vikki

Alumna. Wayward. Striving to become a woman of integrity. Together, we can find light in the darkness of infidelity.

Christine

Alumna. Betrayed. Striving to recover and thrive after betrayal. I believe gratitude is the antidote to grief. If I can help you in your healing, therein lies my own.

Jessica

Alumna. Member, EMS Weekend Retreat Team. Hope and healing are possible for anyone willing to work through the pain.

Chase

Alumnus. Betrayed. Trying to find his way back.

Elizabeth

Alumna. Wayward. A broken and undeserving mess who is learning what real love looks like.

Lisa

Alumna. Betrayed. Determined to be positive as I navigate the quagmire of recovery.

Lynn

Alumna. Betrayed. A soul restored. Encouraging others to keep walking because there is a way through. Author of Keep Walking: 40 Days to Hope and Freedom After Betrayal

Amy

Alumna. Betrayed. Grateful for God's love and grace. Recognizing that with God as my priority, I will be okay no matter what.

Erick

Alumnus. Betrayed. No matter how long it takes or how hard it is, my wife is always worth it!

Julia

Alumna. Betrayed. Learning to love recklessly while I cross the monkey bars of recovery.
"You have to let go at some point in order to move forward." - C.S. Lewis

Reese

Alumna. Betrayed. Walking in obedience to God's direction and experiencing a richer life and Renewed marriage.

Steve

Alumnus. Wayward. Living life differently, enjoying my wife and family, and grateful for God’s love.

Carlie

Alumna. Betrayed. Experiencing God's love after divorce. Celebrating the healing of myself and my identity.

Dana

Alumna. Betrayed. Continuing to fight for my marriage and my children.

Jack

Alumnus. Wayward. Living proof that seeking truth offers both incredible pain and amazing freedom.

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Believing for an outcome

Submitted by Believing on Tue, 08/30/2016 - 11:02

Thank you for all your vlogs Samuel. Your messages are so real and touch so many.

My husband and I are separated as he continues his midlife affair and I asked him to move out. Although he says he doesn't want to work on the marriage, he is showing ambivalence by still wanting joint accounts, not taking any steps towards legal separation, coming around and helping with house issues, etc. Feels like a bit of cake-eating.

God has shown me that our marriage will be restored but I am to get out of His way. Since I am believing for that outcome, I am naturally attached to it. My confusion is how do I get out of His way but still hold the few boundaries I have put in place? How do I show my husband that I'm not holding on to a restoration outcome when that is what I believe is going to happen? From your advice on ambivalence (and my counsellor's) I do not pursue, have mostly detached and no longer ask him about his recovery since he stopped counselling several months ago.

HH has been awesome in my walk but when I have to interact with him, it's like I'm walking a tightrope. Any advice to help clarify how to proceed?

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