How Long Do I Wait Before I See Change?

Samuel, Alumnus
Submitted by Samuel 10 years 5 months

Today Samuel discusses a few key stages spouses find themselves in, as they pursue restoration and healing after the discovery of infidelity.

What type of affair was it?

Our free Affair Analyzer provides you with insights about your unique situation and gives you a personalized plan of action.
Take the Affair Analyzer

What to read next

A Tool to Help Unfaithful Spouses Make Their Betrayed Spouse Feel Safe
Stop Saying, "I'll Never do this Again"
What Should the Betrayed Spouse Do When the Unfaithful Refuses to Get Help?
The Importance of Owning Our Choices and Outcomes When Healing From Infidelity
How Do You Protect Yourself?

Free Surviving Infidelity Bootcamp

Our experts designed this step-by-step guide to help you survive infidelity. Be intentional with your healing with this free 7-day bootcamp.
Learn More
head-silhouette
 
I would highly recommend giving this a try.
 
-D, Texas
Add New Comment

Comments

Submitted by brianems on 10 years 4 months

I am 26 months since discovery. My wife(betrayed) and I attended an EMS weekend, she did Harboring hope course, I completed hope for change, we both completed married for life and we continue to make calls to our EMS weekend group. We both have done therapy locally . We seemed to be making forward progress, then one day at our therapist session, she announced she was moving out...it has been almost 2 months since she left. I am so confused because her change happened so immediately. She says there isn't anyone else in the picture. I wonder sometimes if she is being pressured by her family. I did betray her, but once it was exposed I never lapsed, I met the conditions she laid out in order to stay in the marriage. I am very confused...any insight??? Thank you.

Submitted by Samuel on 10 years 4 months
brianems, it's troubling to say the least. i'm very sorry for the pain of it all for sure. it's a huge guess, but the family piece may be something for sure. often times the pressure from family, when someone is very close to their family, is too much and they resort to pulling back significantly. i don't want to simply give you things that could have happened, as i'm sure your mind is rushing with those potential situations. i agree with you that there certainly could be someone else, yet it's so hard to tell with such limited info. what has been her communication with you or has there been much at all? when spouses are close with family members, it can be difficult for sure as they are torn between what they want and what they want their family to feel and how they don't want to disappoint their family. it can become paralysis for them for sure. has she been open to any counseling at all? have you spoken to rick at all?

Add new comment

The content of this field is kept private and will not be shown publicly.

Plain text

  • No HTML tags allowed.
  • Lines and paragraphs break automatically.
  • Web page addresses and email addresses turn into links automatically.
CAPTCHA
This question is for testing whether or not you are a human visitor and to prevent automated spam submissions.