It was a two year emotional affair until she came to our state and was here for 5 days with him. He says they had sex only one time, but he was with her the entire time she was here. I did not make him leave when I found out about the affair and now I wonder if that was the wrong thing to do since I feel like I am the only one who has paid any consequence for their actions. That is the thing that I am having the most trouble with and don't know how to move past it. I am starting Harboring Hope next week and am hoping that this will help me with my recovery since my husband doesn't feel like counseling or recovery work is really necessary. He thinks we can work on this ourselves. I do feel a little better about things, he seems to be trying to make our marriage better, but I struggle with feeling like he needs to pay some consequence for what he did to me and the absolute devastation it caused me.