Affair Recovery

Sometimes, my thoughts are punishing, my brain on fire.

Have you experienced this?

I am someone who deserves to be understood and cherished rather than criticized and improved.

It is time to arrest the process of depletion caused by the trauma I have suffered. It's time to stop ignoring my body's signals and instead allow them the authority to teach me about myself, time to keep my life as simple and quiet as possible, to allow myself comforts of the senses and small pleasures:

Samuel answers the question of whether the betrayed spouse should be farther along than they are.

Samuel shares insight from his own personal journey on finding personal healing and restoration.

Samuel discusses what contempt does to couples who are trying to heal from infidelity or addiction.

Samuel discusses what to do when couples feel stuck.

Today, my heart is reminded of the pain that once was, the pain that so many of you find yourselves in today. For me, it is a distant, tender scar. It is healing, but if I stare at it long enough or touch it in just the right ways, the pain can all come rushing back.

If you are in the middle of this kind of suffering, you are likely desperate for relief of any kind. Violently painful memories have carved your heart into pieces, and maybe you can't even remember what life looked like before this whirlwind of torment...

Samuel discusses a pitfall many spouses fall into after the discovery of infidelity or addiction.

Samuel shares encouragement and perspective for those who are trying to heal.

Samuel discusses a toxic struggle both unfaithful and betrayed spouses fall into.

Samuel discusses tools to help the unfaithful and betrayed spouse heal despite fear of uncertainty.

These are words that I have had to unlearn and relearn—words that I thought I knew, but now realize I misunderstood for most of my life. Now, they actually mean something to me.

Growing up, I would attend church with my mom and siblings. I had just enough of a smattering of church "sayings" and knowledge about the Bible to become familiar with them. But honestly, there was far more I did not understand than what I did understand. Most of the time, when I went...

Samuel interviews Rob about his life before, during, and after his wife's infidelity.

This is a question that almost all of us have asked or heard at some point during recovery from infidelity. It might have been screamed in anger, or muttered in a barely audible cry of exasperation. And it is a question we often hear over and over again, "How could you?" It is a good question, and it lies at the heart and sum of all of the pain created when people like me have affairs. It is as if we look to the heavens and we cry out in our pain, a guttural "why?"

While...

Samuel discusses doing hard things in repair work.